The Looking Glass – A Poetic Reflection by Denedria Banks

A few weeks ago, while in the midst of spring cleaning, I came across a poem I wrote seventeen years ago. Reading the poem transported me to a different time and place – the uncertainty I felt at thirty-one.  In that moment, I felt for my younger self because of the questions she had. As I finished reading the poem, I smiled in acknowledgement of the women I grew into. Although I still have flaws, imperfections, and moments of uncertainty, I know now how to meet myself with grace and love.

I decided to share this poem with our Life Focus Center Community as a reminder that we all move through difficult seasons. Sometimes we are fortunate to move through the season(s) without a need for assistance while, at other times, we may need someone to help pull us through. In either case, I want you to remember two things: 

  1.  you are not alone;
  2. your current season will change. 

If you feel you need a hand to pull you through a difficult season, please contact Life Focus Center as we will work to assist you through.

 

The Looking Glass

Staring down the looking glass, I see whispers of a time gone by.

Memories have faded – I no longer know where I belong

Walking around, I feel lost now. The world is too big and moving way too fast.

I wonder where I’ve been. I’m trying hard to remember my past.

I remember a happy place (or was it a time?) where I was light, in love, and always seemed to be walking on cloud nine.

Nothing was too fast, life just continued to flow. There was no “hustle and bustle,”  your place was all your own.

My fantasy world has been shattered somehow because the world seems too loud now.

I’m constantly surrounded by sound, swimming in a sea of loud.

Is it my fears that I hear or my expectations really that loud?

Time seems to have sped up and left me in its dust – with no time to consider myself, I’m feeling out of luck.

I’m a little uneasy, off-kilter, and out of sorts. Kind of lost in this storm of uncertainty. Man, it really did get the best of me.

Got to pick up the pieces, put this puzzle back together again. Got to be stronger than this – can’t let this consume me.

Too many things I want to do with my life – not ready to go.

I want to be married, have a family, make love one more time, drive down the coast, and hang out with my friends (if only one more time). Sing to the radio, write another poem, break up to make up, fall in love all over again, and capture the dream I don’t yet have.

Got to come back! I got to find my place in this new time. I just can’t let go now.

Hmmm…look at this…either life is beginning to slow down or I just began to catch up in the looking glass.